[ he must've been close by because it doesn't take him long to get there. he looks tired and his clothes are wrinkled and he closes the door behind him quietly like he's worried he might get yelled at if he makes too much noise. and then after that, realises he shouldn't just sneak around silently anyway. ]
[Any form of 'sneaking' or 'silent' are not things that Jane would often think to apply to Izō, so when he walks in so quietly and speaks up so softly to announce his presence she knows that the feeling she'd had of something being very wrong was right on the money.
She moves out of the kitchen to join him, looking him up and down as he stands there. Her expression is soft - a little fond, maybe - but concerned, too.]
[ he shrugs, looking awkward until he shoves his hands in his pockets. he's not dressed in his usual clothes which, as it turns out, was unwise because he doesn't even have his scarf to hide behind right now. he needs to stop visiting people dressed like this. ]
Fine, mostly. Sorta the problem, don'tcha think?
[ he's waiting for the balance to be restored and to receive the consequences of his actions. ]
Well, I-- I would think it would be the preferred state of things.
[She's glad to see he's not hurt, so just what has he been up to that has him so out of sorts? Jane frowns, approaching him and - after only a moment of hesitation - places both hands on his shoulders.]
... Let's sit down. I just finished making the tea.
[And then they can... talk, because he surely wouldn't have come here without complaining if he didn't intend to do that, right?]
[ he doesn't look her in the eye, altogether giving off the energy of a kicked puppy. it's been a rough few days. ]
Yeah? A'ight...
[ he sits down where she directs him to, pressing his hands together between his knees to avoid fidgeting with them. this lasts about two seconds. he's tense, but he also sinks into the chair just because he's exhausted. ]
Dunno what t' say. Can't really say much, 'cause I ain't snitchin' on nobody. Only sayin' all that shit what happened, happened 'cause I was one'a the people who fucked up.
[She joins him quickly enough, with two cups of tea and some sugar on a tray. This is set down, then she seats herself next to him and looks him up and down.
Has she ever seen him looking quite so downtrodden? She doesn't think so.]
I'm not going to ask you to, uhm... snitch. [Even if it might be for the best that everyone knows who to watch out for, if someone capable of what had happened is still roaming around... that isn't why she asked him over.]
But I want to know what happened. [Ignoring her tea for now, she takes hold of one of his fidgeting hands.] Izō... what did you do?
[ it's an effort not to pull his hand away and he uses the other to pick at invisible threads on his clothes instead. he does his best to lay out what he knows without revealing too much, explaining about how'd he'd helped with the efforts related to the weird text riddle blast that had gone out earlier. in his limited capacity for explaining these things, it's probably a little confusing, but he does his best. ]
So then this guy said he had this ritual an' needed help makin' it work, 'cause the fae murdered his brother an' it wasn't fair what happened. I ain't real good at makin' that kinda call, so I was jus' happy goin' along with somebody else. Whole thing was bullshit though 'cause it wasn't his brother at all. They said it was this "Fisher King" guy an' now everybody's sufferin' a whole lot 'cause'a me.
[It is confusing when she can't get the whole story out of him, but she supposes that the 'who' doesn't really matter when it comes to telling her... because what is she going to do, really?
Besides, she only really has one concern here. Her friend.]
So you were tricked.
[Though she doesn't necessarily think Izō is the overly trusting type, she knows how he is about... feeling as if he's only really good for one thing. It's a trait that's easy to play on. Even Jane could do it, if she was that kind of person.]
Oh, dear... You have got yourself into a mess, haven't you.
[He definitely looks sorry, which is really most of the reason why she isn't that angry with him. Disappointed? Yes, a little, but that's only to be expected given everything that had happened if he's saying he was directly involved...]
From the sounds of things you don't deserve to be in trouble over this either.
[She gives his hand a small squeeze, holding it cupped between both of hers.]
It isn't cowardice to not want to take the blame for something that wasn't your fault. And this other person... do they know you're trying to take the fall for them?
[Jane says this with a tiny smile, but she can see how this is... hurting him? Has she ever seen him like this? There's always been a brashness about him that is completely missing now.
She always seems to be getting herself into problems that are far too big for her to solve, but that doesn't mean she isn't going to try.]
Don't you think... you've earned the right to think of yourself as more than that? To want to give yourself more than that? [Jane asks him softly, lowering and tilting her head to try and catch his gaze.] I think you're worth more than that, Izō. Maybe that's stupid of me, but I do. You're worth more.
[ izō shakes his head, using the hand he still has free to try and hunker down behind the protective shield of his hair and his scarf like he always does. which only manages to accomplish so much. ]
Fuck. Fuck. Jus' don't fuckin' look..!
[ what he doesn't want her to see is his weakness because he's shown entirely too much of that already, in his opinion. it's not even that he's sad — although that's obviously a part of it — more that it's just too much all at once. her kindness on top of everything else just manages to be more than he can handle when he already feels terribly vulnerable and ashamed. ]
Can't do anythin' right... exactly what I got comin' t'me.
[The pit drops out of her stomach. Is he-- is he crying? She hadn't meant to upset him... But then maybe upset isn't the right word.]
Izō... [Jane says gently, and she lets go of his hand. She lets go of his hand and she dares to shift forwards enough to slip her hands over his shoulders, to brush her fingers into his hair, and she dares to pull the great manslayer Okada Izō's forehead down to her shoulder as she loops one arm around his back and hugs him warmly.]
Hey... everything's going to be all right. [She rubs her hand against his back.] It's going to be okay.
[ this is so much easier when he's a dog. but even if he might want to hide in that form, it takes a little too much concentration to get his magic to work like that right now. so he just has to sit here and accept it because now that the floodgates are open the only thing for it is to let it all out. it's hard to know exactly how long he was holding it all in this time. he's just too sober to be comfortable but then his pride has taken a beating lately, so it amounts to this.
he doesn't fight her because it's pointless. if she's seen this much, is accepting it going to make it worse? maybe. but it's already a bad look. at least it feels... nice. ]
Ain't what I was tryna—... real pathetic lookin', I know.
[ of course, he has to have an explanation for himself. ]
[She lets him get it out because it feels like he needs it, samurai pride and shame be damned. Jane had known from the moment she saw him that whatever had happened was weighing heavily on him but she had not anticipated just how much until now.
Her fingers touch against his hair again, brush over it, then she rests her hand against the back of his head.]
I promise, I don't. I think... you're going through a lot right now, hm?
[Maybe more than he's told her. Getting into a bit of trouble isn't something she would have expected would bother him this much.
She definitely thought he'd resist being comforted.]
Ya seen the sky, ain'tcha? Now everybody can see it all the time, what's comin'. Kids out there'n shit. Ryouma got cursed. People died. I dunno how t' fix it... other'n gettin' the guy who done it.
[ he hasn't been to look at the calamity for a reason. and now he can't not look at it. he lacks the capacity to truly deal with that sort of existential terror at this point.
he's calmer now, but the stress of it makes him shake. or maybe he needs a smoke. or both. ]
Jus' gonna stay outta everybody's way. If somebody wants t' take a shot at me, ain't gonna stop it. Ain't gonna jus' roll over'n die. But I ain't protestin'.
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cantgetanyworse) wrote2021-03-04 04:14 pm
text; un: manslayer
mostly because jane has a boyfriend. unlike kate (sorry kate). ]u busy? gotta talk to u
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Not too busy for you. Is something the matter?
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What's wrong?
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so at least theres that thats good u aint one of em
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[This doesn't sound like an 'over text' conversation.]
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if u want
maybe u wont wanna talk to me after
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The door will be open. I'm putting tea on, so hurry up.
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... 'm here.
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She moves out of the kitchen to join him, looking him up and down as he stands there. Her expression is soft - a little fond, maybe - but concerned, too.]
... Are you all right?
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Fine, mostly. Sorta the problem, don'tcha think?
[ he's waiting for the balance to be restored and to receive the consequences of his actions. ]
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[She's glad to see he's not hurt, so just what has he been up to that has him so out of sorts? Jane frowns, approaching him and - after only a moment of hesitation - places both hands on his shoulders.]
... Let's sit down. I just finished making the tea.
[And then they can... talk, because he surely wouldn't have come here without complaining if he didn't intend to do that, right?]
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Yeah? A'ight...
[ he sits down where she directs him to, pressing his hands together between his knees to avoid fidgeting with them. this lasts about two seconds. he's tense, but he also sinks into the chair just because he's exhausted. ]
Dunno what t' say. Can't really say much, 'cause I ain't snitchin' on nobody. Only sayin' all that shit what happened, happened 'cause I was one'a the people who fucked up.
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Has she ever seen him looking quite so downtrodden? She doesn't think so.]
I'm not going to ask you to, uhm... snitch. [Even if it might be for the best that everyone knows who to watch out for, if someone capable of what had happened is still roaming around... that isn't why she asked him over.]
But I want to know what happened. [Ignoring her tea for now, she takes hold of one of his fidgeting hands.] Izō... what did you do?
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So then this guy said he had this ritual an' needed help makin' it work, 'cause the fae murdered his brother an' it wasn't fair what happened. I ain't real good at makin' that kinda call, so I was jus' happy goin' along with somebody else. Whole thing was bullshit though 'cause it wasn't his brother at all. They said it was this "Fisher King" guy an' now everybody's sufferin' a whole lot 'cause'a me.
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Besides, she only really has one concern here. Her friend.]
So you were tricked.
[Though she doesn't necessarily think Izō is the overly trusting type, she knows how he is about... feeling as if he's only really good for one thing. It's a trait that's easy to play on. Even Jane could do it, if she was that kind of person.]
Oh, dear... You have got yourself into a mess, haven't you.
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... Yeah, I—... I guess. Ain't gotta say it like that though...
[ does he look sufficiently sorry? because he sure feels it. ]
There's somebody I don't wanna get in trouble, 'cause it ain't deserved. So if it's on me, it's on me. I ain't a coward!
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From the sounds of things you don't deserve to be in trouble over this either.
[She gives his hand a small squeeze, holding it cupped between both of hers.]
It isn't cowardice to not want to take the blame for something that wasn't your fault. And this other person... do they know you're trying to take the fall for them?
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[ people he knows and actually cares about suffered over this. he can't let himself off the hook that easily.
izō has a harder time owning up to the next question because he does this a lot. taking things on himself without saying so, that is. ]
Probably... not? Ain't like it came up. But that's m' job, 'cause I'm a Servant. It's jus' how it goes. Duty or whatever.
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[Jane says this with a tiny smile, but she can see how this is... hurting him? Has she ever seen him like this? There's always been a brashness about him that is completely missing now.
She always seems to be getting herself into problems that are far too big for her to solve, but that doesn't mean she isn't going to try.]
Don't you think... you've earned the right to think of yourself as more than that? To want to give yourself more than that? [Jane asks him softly, lowering and tilting her head to try and catch his gaze.] I think you're worth more than that, Izō. Maybe that's stupid of me, but I do. You're worth more.
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Fuck. Fuck. Jus' don't fuckin' look..!
[ what he doesn't want her to see is his weakness because he's shown entirely too much of that already, in his opinion. it's not even that he's sad — although that's obviously a part of it — more that it's just too much all at once. her kindness on top of everything else just manages to be more than he can handle when he already feels terribly vulnerable and ashamed. ]
Can't do anythin' right... exactly what I got comin' t'me.
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Izō... [Jane says gently, and she lets go of his hand. She lets go of his hand and she dares to shift forwards enough to slip her hands over his shoulders, to brush her fingers into his hair, and she dares to pull the great manslayer Okada Izō's forehead down to her shoulder as she loops one arm around his back and hugs him warmly.]
Hey... everything's going to be all right. [She rubs her hand against his back.] It's going to be okay.
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he doesn't fight her because it's pointless. if she's seen this much, is accepting it going to make it worse? maybe. but it's already a bad look. at least it feels... nice. ]
Ain't what I was tryna—... real pathetic lookin', I know.
[ of course, he has to have an explanation for himself. ]
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[She lets him get it out because it feels like he needs it, samurai pride and shame be damned. Jane had known from the moment she saw him that whatever had happened was weighing heavily on him but she had not anticipated just how much until now.
Her fingers touch against his hair again, brush over it, then she rests her hand against the back of his head.]
I promise, I don't. I think... you're going through a lot right now, hm?
[Maybe more than he's told her. Getting into a bit of trouble isn't something she would have expected would bother him this much.
She definitely thought he'd resist being comforted.]
It's all right.
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[ he hasn't been to look at the calamity for a reason. and now he can't not look at it. he lacks the capacity to truly deal with that sort of existential terror at this point.
he's calmer now, but the stress of it makes him shake. or maybe he needs a smoke. or both. ]
Jus' gonna stay outta everybody's way. If somebody wants t' take a shot at me, ain't gonna stop it. Ain't gonna jus' roll over'n die. But I ain't protestin'.
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